www.BPODigest.com i-Vortal

Meanings Redefined

* Divorce: Future tense of marriage.

* Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.

* Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either"

* Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

* Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

* Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water power...

* Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.

* Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

* Classic: A book which people praise, but do not read.

* Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

* Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

* Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

* Etc: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

* Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

* Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

* Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

* Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.

* Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.

* Optimist: A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."

* Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.

* Father: A banker provided by nature.

* Criminal: A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught.

* Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

* Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence after.

* Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.